life as we know it

1.     Tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?
When I first met him, I didn’t realise I’d fall for him as hard as I did. But there was something sweet about him and he made me feel wanted and I liked that. 

What on your body is hurting or bothering you?
my head.

What was your last thought before going to bed last night?
Not quite sure.

What are you listening to?
Bones on tv

What’s something you’re not looking forward to?
Work for the next week

Where do you think your best friend is right now?
I don’t have a bestfriend

Have you kissed anybody in the last 5 days?
10 minutes ago =)

Sex on the first date?
Definately not.

Kiss on the first date?
Yes

Is there one person you want to be with right now?
Someone to keep my company.

Are you seriously happy with where you are in life?
In some ways yes 

Is there something you would like to say to someone?
No, not really.

What are three things you did today?
went to work, went out for lunch, chilled. 

Would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over?
They’re both fine

What is your favorite kind of gum?
Mint.

Are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/ girlfriends?
no.

What is on your wrists right now?
A hair tie, a bracelet and a woven bracelet/friendship bracelet.

Do you hate when people call you when you’re sleeping?
I always have my phone on silent when I’m sleeping, except on weekends. but no I don’t really mind.

Ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with?
Definately.

Who’s the biggest slut you know?
Not mentioning any names.

Does anyone have strong feelings for you?
I certainly hope so.

Are you slowly drifting away from someone?
yes.. 

Have you ever wasted your time on someone?
Definately.

Can you do the alphabet in sign language?
no

How long have you had MySpace?
I had a myspace for about 3 years but deleted it last year.

How have you felt today?
Very Tired.

You receive $60 without any reason, what do you spend it on?
save it 

What is wrong with you right now?
I’m extremely tired

Is there anyone you’re really disappointed in?
No, not really.

Would you rather have Starbucks or Jamba Juice right now?
haven’t had either.

Why aren’t you in ‘love’ with your last ex anymore?
I was 12, and i wasn’t in love.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
I fell asleep about 11 

When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
I don’t have a bestfriend

What were you doing an hour ago?
watching Glee with the lovely

What are you looking forward to in the next month?
starting Tafe

Are you anything like you were at this point last year?
not too sure.

Are you wearing jeans right now?
trackies

Are you a patient person?
I like to think I am

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months?
I’ve been in one for almost 18 months so yeah

Favorite color?
blue/purple

Are you missing someone?
definately.

Did you have a dream last night?
Can’t remember.

Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
sweatpants 

If someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be?
Bradley

Do you love anyone who is not related to you?
Brad, friends

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
Unless it’s Brad. no

Do you like meeting new people?
yes

Are you afraid of falling in love?
nope

Ever liked someone older than you?
I do

Has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
Yes.

Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?
quite a lot

I called Poppy Bella before. I didn’t realise how much it hurts until I actually thought about it. Poppy was meant to be the family’s replacement dog because everyone was so upset over Bella that no one had anything to say to eachother anymore. But the truth is.. I’m not over Bella’s death yet. It was a cruel way for her to die and she was the best dog ever! And they way she always took care of me when I was sick was just amamzing. When we found out she had cancer I cried for 3 hours. And Bella came and sat next to me and put her head on my lap and sat there until I stopped crying. She knew she was sick but she wanted to make sure everyone else was okay before she thought about herself. and for a family pet to do that was just amazing. She really was a part of this family. She made the family stay together. I just never thought about it until now. Until today.

I really miss her. I miss they guilty look she used to give us when she knew she did something wrong. I miss the smile she used to give us when we walked through the door. And as gross as is was, I miss when she used to fart, and was able to clear a room in seconds, and after everyone left she would just sigh and slowly go off to sleep.

I miss you Bella, and I know that you’re watching over me. I hope you are.

 1999- Me 6 years old.

I’ve been thinking about life… When you see those people who have done things for people living in poverty or they have helped people who have cancer and terrible things like that, those people inspire me. They inspire me to be a better person and also to achieve something in life. To be remembered is what I want. I really don’t care about much else. I want to help people, I don’t know how or when I want to do this but I don’t want to waste my life on shit that isn’t going to do me any good in the long run.

I wish it were easy but it isn’t it never is. And I have no clue why…